A large tear drop landed onto the page so loud the atoms in the air could hear it. The words were hard to write today. She had a lot on her plate but also knew this story had to get out.
The things she struggled with and had overcome was a fire she passed through, coming out on the other end a diamond shining for God’s glory. The fire was not over, it had only begun. A hunger for connecting her testimony and God’s power to the shackled women afar; or not so far.
The smell of robust grounds arose from the breakfast bar. She slid her chair back and dried her tears with a nearby cloth. Maybe she didn’t have what it took to do this.
Shutting her laptop, she took her mug out onto the porch and watched as a startled bird flew away. She felt like that bird. Startled from something bigger than herself.
Sighing deep, she talked aloud to God about it.
Am I doing the right thing? I don’t even feel like I’m doing a good job. I get going and then it’s like I crash and burn. Father, help. Did I make the right choice? You know I love doing this but I am starting to doubt. I don’t want to waste precious time when I could be ministering to people. Is this really where you want me?
She stood quietly. The only sounds came from her neighbor’s dog, Bear, and the nearby but just-enough-far-away echo of the highway traffic. Somewhere down the line, she started believing that work was a bad thing.
Maybe it was the emphasis on actual ministries, or the negative remarks when a person wouldn’t be at church because they were working that day. She couldn’t quite put a finger on it, but the nagging feeling got on her nerves.
She wanted to write and blog without holding back. If you were to ask her how she would live if she knew God approved, her answer would be, “To write words that leave people better than before they read them.”
She was tired of feeling guilty for doing what she loved, and when she wrote from a place of joy and freedom, the words flowed. When she let her mind take off on a wild goose chase of wonderings, she almost never recovered the entire day. The words, that is.
She could usually get on with her daily mom life, but the nagging sense that words were left unsaid to the stark white screen would follow her around until the next time she could freely and honestly plant them down.
God deliver me from this lie that has hold of me, telling me what I do is wrong. Deliver me from its grasp and bless my work. Give me joy abundantly and strong faith to wield off the enemy’s arrows. I know this is where you have me. For a reason, for a purpose.
You literally weaved my life and I see how you divinely brought me to this place. Help me to remember this the next time a doubt starts to creep up. Alert my spirit so I can realize what is going on. Bless my writing, Father, so I can bless others. Amen.
Making her way back into the house, she determined to take the rest of the day off to focus on sifting through the scriptures and drinking in God’s truth. After all, there was no way she could effectively minister from a place of doubt. Or could she?
It might just be so. Because you see, she is writing this to you right now in the aftermath of the struggle. In the time it took to write this post, God reminded her that in fact He DOES want her to continue.
He reminded her that she already obeyed and stepped out in faith, and now she needs to keep in step.
Do you think work can glorify God? She does. Because in everything we say and do we have a choice. We can either bless or curse. We can give or we can take. We can represent God well or do our own thing. We can forget Him or acknowledge Him.
Yes. We can glorify God in our work. It doesn’t matter if we are stay at home moms working from a desk, or if we are architects with clipboards, or even the person weed eating the city park. We can glorify God in what we do by doing our best and loving others as we do it.
Work is a ministry.
“..I’m convinced—Jesus convinced me!—that everything as it is in itself is holy. We, of course, by the way we treat it or talk about it, can contaminate it.” Romans 14:13/14 The Message
“Hard work brings prosperity; playing around brings poverty.” Proverbs 28:19 The Living Bible
“Work hard and cheerfully at all you do, just as though you were working for the Lord and not merely for your masters, remembering that it is the Lord Christ who is going to pay you, giving you your full portion of all he owns. He is the one you are really working for.” Colossians 3:23-24 The Living Bible
“Do you see a man diligent and skillful in his business? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before obscure men.” Proverbs 22:29 AMPC
“Serve with a positive attitude, as to the Lord and not to men—” Ephesians 6:7 The Tree of Life Version