Life doesn’t come prepackaged with a special box of quiet, but busy moms can make margin with this short guide.
We have to be super intentional about setting aside chunks of time that are specifically set aside for daily refreshing.
Everyone is different and some moms actually thrive in the loud, in the crowd, and in what feels like ultimate chaos to another.
Personality types do factor in.
In her book,Overwhelmed, Kathi Lipp brings up the different types of overwhelm we can experience.
I love that she broke them down and builds us up, reassuring us that we are not weird, we are just wired differently.
Personally, I need bubble space to recharge.
We can’t have a perfect life, but we can have an orderly life of sorts if we take control of our days.
We don’t have to sign up for the next big thing, put our kids in whatever comes available just because everyone else is — or feel pressured to mamange our homes like so and so.
God made us unique. Our living circumstances are unique.
We can learn how to best manage our households and selves by learning how we live best and give best.
Blog friend Kelly R. Baker shares a great time management tip that is simple to apply starting now.
When we get a handle on just how important it is for us to be put together before we charge out into the open day, we will start making it a priority.
Making space for daily recharging doesn’t just happen, even when you understand all of this though. With Kelly’s tip, you can take action now and start seeing results.
In her 30 Minute Method, you will learn how to be accountable for your time by giving things time limits. (You know, instead of assuming you will quit at a reasonable time, and then find yourself late for the next thing!)
Most of us can’t just roll out of bed and go. We need a time of preparation.
For some of us, this needs to happen a few times throughout the day as we transition into other activities.
For example: The last hour before my kids get out of school, I leave for only small tasks. I do not want to get caught up in something big and loose track of time.
I use 45 minutes for small tasks and the last 15 minutes for making sure I have everything I need and head out.
Taking action and keeping to your plan really will help & promote peace.
Without action, we are left to the same hamster wheel cycle. Even experimenting with a new idea is better than remaining stuck.
Don’t remain stuck from fear or doubt. And don’t be afraid to fail if it doesn’t look how you think it should right away.
Change takes time. More than anything, you will be trying, and I am guessing your family will see this, even if they don’t outwardly express it.
Daily, how we live — impacts us.
It impacts ourselves and those around us. Don’t get all bogged down from this fact. You don’t need to turn into a robot and carry the weight of the world on your shoulders all of the sudden. As a busy mom who is hungry for quiet time, you may already feel that way anyhow.
I am here to encourage you today to say, “Good job. Good job for sticking with things even when they are hard. Good job for loving when you feel worn and need love yourself. Now it’s time to make time for yourself. Because you need energy to be on your feet!”
Take that pep talk for what it is. No over or under spiritualizing, just a word hug from me to you.
Make Margin By Cutting Out the Excess
In order to make daily margin so you can function at full throttle (assuming you are in good health), you have to start with the slicing and dicing process.
*There is no pretty way to get around this. I’ve heard it said that when you say yes to something, you also say no to something.
*Every time you say yes, you pile on more. If you have gotten to where this is an unreasonable amount of piling, first thing is to nip it in the bud.
- Starting today, determine to go on a “yes” fast. Not because you are being selfish, but because you have in fact overloaded yourself and can not serve with your best because you are depleated.
- Make a list of all the activities, functions, services, groups, and events you are involved in. This includes tasks at home, indoors and outdoors.
- Put them in order of most important to least important.
- There’s only so much you and your family can do at full throttle. Determine to shave off the excess, which is where the tipping point occurs.
- Once you start getting to where your eyebrows are raised and an inner feeling of doubt and questioning if you can do it start to happen, put an asterick there on your list.
- You need to take the whole list to God in prayer (with your spouse if available, if not you can find a prayer partner at church or email me and I would be happy to pray with you).
- Specifically ask for guidance where the asterisk is placed, being fully honest with how overwhelmed you feel. God will lead you my friend.
A Change of Pace
It is not always easy letting go of activities we have belonged to for extended periods of time, or even years. Our flesh may be so used to being high strung on living off of fumes that we don’t even know how to function in any other way.
Friend, you are not alone here. Like any other new habit we take on, it takes time. Making daily margin by cutting out the excess will pay off. You will see.
Keep Margin. Don’t Be Guilt-Led. Be God-Led
There will be times when you are tempted to trade your newly made margin in for something else.
Though life does throw curve balls, and not everyone can have margin at the same time of day, we can still pray before saying yes.
- We don’t have to know the answer when someone asks up to sign up.
- We don’t have to know right away if we can or can’t.
If you are like me, a quick creator but a s..l..o..w processor, sometimes the best answer is, “I am not sure at this present moment. I need to pray about it but I will get back to you!”
That true line has been a new habit in my life, one that has helped my compassionate heart from self-sabotaging me further.
Try this and see. Let me know how it works for you.
Blog Post Breakdown:
- Realize the need for daily quiet.
- Carve out space for daily quiet.
- Keep your daily quiet time on your top priorities to ensure you are operating at full throttle.
For the busy mom who can’t seem to find time for daily quiet:
- Sit down in the middle of your sock pile and make a running list of everything you are involved in, putting them in order of importance.
- At the point you start to feel the inner pang of overwhelm, mark that point on your sheet.
- Take the list to God in prayer, namely asking for what to shave off at your tipping point, if not all.
- Keep your margin a priority.